Discworld May Day

(Tune: Padstow May Song, trad.)

Unite and unite and let us all unite,
For summer is a-coming today,
And all across the Discworld, we all will unite,
In the merry morning of May.

The wizards of Morpork, they might if they would,
For summer is a-coming today,
They might have sang an anthem from the high Tower of Art,
In the merry morning of May.

The assassins of Morpork, they might if they would,
For summer is a-coming today,
They might have built a garland with blossoms from Hide Park,
In the merry morning of May.

Oh, where's the Elf King? Oh, where is he-o?
He's under the Long Man, deep in Faerie-o.
Down dives the Suicide Thrush of Lancre-o.
Nanny Gytha Ogg saw the mound from above,
And it looked like a tonker-o.

Oh, where have the wizard and assassins got?
For summer is a-coming today,
They've all stayed a-bed, they might have but would not,
In the merry morning of May.

(All May festivals are from the books, or at least the supplementary material. The Companion describes the UU May anthem, and how, since the Tower of Art is 800 feet tall, the listeners can't hear the choir and don't notice if they haven't turned up; the Assassins Guild Diary goes into a long description of the May Blossom tradition that concludes "for the past seventy years, no boy has bothered to give it a try"; and Nanny mentions the Scouring of the Long Man in A Tourist's Guide to Lancre, including its useful educational aspects.)